Clash of the Gender-benders
SailorUranus x Nuriko x Ranma Saotome
The mid-morning sun was perfect for a stroll in the beautiful gardens of Infinity Academy. And since Haruka has no class at that time, she thought it best to visit Michiru at the school’s indoor swimming pool.
Haruka was walking along a beautiful flower garden when she heard something on the other side of the garden wall.
“Could someone be in trouble?” she asked herself.
With the recent monster activity in Infinity Academy, this aroused her curiousity and so she decided to take a look.
There, Haruka saw a lady in Chinese clothing seemingly worried about something.
The lady was very beautiful, with her long purple braid flowing on her back. She also had curious-looking golden bracelets decorated with a big blue stone. But what got Haruka’s attention was a mole on the lady’s face, below and a little over the edge of her right eye.
Haruka blushed. She recognized the lady as Nuriko from the Astronomy class.
“Oh, where could it be? I can’t show myself to the guys looking like this,” Nuriko said to herself.
Haruka wondered what Nuriko was talking about. She watched Nuriko search for something in the garden.
Nuriko walked to a line of Grecian columns. Haruka thought Nuriko looked perfectly beautiful in a background of pillars. She looked like a Greek goddess.
Nuriko scratched her head. “I know that man left it here. I saw him yesterday.”
Haruka watched her hold one of the columns. “What is this lady doing?” Then, in total shock, Haruka saw Nuriko pull the column and lifted it like Hercules.
Haruka couldn’t believe what she was seeing.
Quickly, her sailorsoldier instinct tingled and with no one in sight she transformed into the Soldier of the Sky, SailorUranus.
“Another weekly monster for us, I see,” SailorUranus thought. She showed herself to confront the new enemy. “How dare you destroy a perfectly beautiful garden? I, SailorUranus, will make sure you pay for that dearly. I will punish you in the name of the planet Uranus!”
Nuriko’s reaction afterwards was not what SailorUranus had in mind. “Wow! You’re a soldier from the heavens? Me too! I’m a Celestial warrior!”
“Are you insulting me?” SailorUranus hissed. She called out for her legendary weapon. “Space Sword!”
Seeing the sharp weapon materialize in SailorUranus’ hand, Nuriko had a glimmer in her eye and a wide smile.
“That’s exactly what I need! Can I borrow that sword?” Nuriko started running towards the SailorUranus.
However, SailorUranus was more than happy to see her enemy rushing towards her. That way, she could use her sailor senshi powers to its fullest. She lifted her hand and shouted for her power: “Earth Shaking!” Then a big ball of energy blasted the Herculean enemy out of sight.
Then SailorUranus thought of the big mistake she had done by throwing Nuriko away. “The enemy might start wreaking havoc around the academy, hurting more innocents than it could had I destroyed it already.”
SailorUranus ran off to the woods to find Nuriko.
SailorUranus was walking quietly when she heard a voice say “Oh this is a good spot to hide.” She was quick to respond and traced the direction where the voice came from.
She was lucky enough to find a braid of hair over some bushes. “Did you think you could hide from me by changing your looks?” she shouted. Then, as fast as the wind, she grabbed the end of the braid and pulled with all her strength.
“Ow, ow, ow, ow! Hey, what’s the big idea?” a voice cracked.
SailorUranus looked at the owner of the red braid. It wasn’t Nuriko. To her surprise it was a top-heavy, cute, little girl in baggy, red Chinese clothing. Before the girl could look behind, SailorUranus set her Space Sword aside and transformed back to being Haruka Tenoh. She let go of the braid and faced the redhead girl.
“I apologize. I have mistaken you for someone else, young lady,” Haruka said. She recognized the girl as Ranko Saotome from the Martial Arts class.
Haruka took Ranko’s hand to apologize. It was soft and fragile. She bent over and kissed it. Ranko didn’t seem to like it. So Haruka thought of the next best thing: she walked closer to Ranko and bent over to kiss the cute girl on the lips. She noticed how Ranko’s face became the same color as her hair.
“How dare you…” Ranko blurted. Then Ranko slapped her so hard, Haruka thought she would lose her beautiful face.
Eyes closed and rubbing her cheeks, Haruka smiled. “I guess I deserved that.”
“No. This is what you deserve,” another voice said, but this time it was a guy’s.
When Haruka opened her eyes, Ranko was gone and a guy with black braids was standing before her. Before she could even ask where Ranko went to, the guy (whom Haruka thought looked eeriely like Ranko) lifted a fist and smacked the lights out of her.
Haruka’s head was spinning when she felt someone beside her. In her blurry vision, she saw it was Nuriko.
“Are you alright, Mr. Gorgeous?’ Nuriko asked. Haruka thought Nuriko couldn’t recognize the sailorsoldier who just threw her away moments ago. “Who did this to you?”
“I did!” answered the guy in braids. “And that Mr. Gorgeous of yours deserves more than that!”
“Hang in there, Mr. Gorgeous,” Nuriko told Haruka. Nuriko stood up to confront the guy in braids.
“How dare you knock down beautiful people? I won’t let this go easily. I, Nuriko, celestial warrior of Suzaku will bring you to your knees! State your name.”
The guy in braids turned to face them away. “Ranma Saotome. Don’t bother fighting me. I don’t fight girls.”
“Oh yeah?” Nuriko reacted. “Well, so do I…”
Haruka got goosebumps over Ranma’s screams as he battled the Herculean lady. Nuriko left Ranma with dislocated joints and broken bones. Haruka was surprised that the guy was still alive though.
“Thank you” was the only thing Haruka could say to Nuriko. It appeared that Nuriko was not a monster. Could the lady be a sailorsoldier as well?
“Let me help you stand up.” Nuriko held her and slowly brought her up. Haruka had nasty thoughts in mind, though. She wanted to cop a feel at the lady’s breasts so she “accidentally” placed a hand in Nuriko’s chest.
But all she felt was skin and chest bone. No lump. She thought it was like a man’s chest.
“You naughty, gorgeous man,” Nuriko said with a wink. What do you think you’re doing, huh?”
Haruka had a faint and nervous smile on her face.
Nuriko smiled sweetly. “Well, even if I am biologically male, I can be better than any woman in this world when it comes to loving another man.”
Nuriko saw the Space Sword and picked it up. “This is exactly what I need since I couldn’t find the garden shears.” He cut his long braid with it and put the hair in his pocket. “Now, no one would ever mistake me for a girl,” Nuriko smiled.
“Somebody just kill me,” Haruka thought.
This encounter of the anime gender-benders had been in my head since Questor Magazine put up a Fight! section in their magazine back in 2000 and asked readers to send in their own original stories of anime characters battling it out. I think I even mailed them a different story involving the three characters here but it never got into print. I guess I’m just not talented in storytelling. ^ ^
– All black and white drawings are original works of jose arboleda jr.